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NOTE: The questions below were submitted to Doug and Tracy Kelley's Perfect Relationships website (no longer available).

They are available here as a further resource for making difficult decisions regarding an alcoholic relationship.

My wife was seeing a therapist because one of her friends was seeing one. We've been fighting a lot lately and I think she's just had it with me and my temper." I asked about his temper. You never talk to me.' Then I get so mad I begin to talk to her. "I think her father used to beat her up pretty badly." "And have you ever felt like hitting her?

That's probably how all the trouble started in the first place, and now I'm here." "Many men who enter into therapy for the first time think the same thing," I responded, and tried to reassure him that I didn't think that he was crazy. Usually they're just looking for help with a personal problem from a person who can present them with a fresh point of view." He breathed a sigh of relief, unfolded his arms, and uncrossed his legs. "I want to be left alone when I get angry," he responded, "so I go off by myself. " He said emphatically, "It's crossed my mind a couple of times." Then I asked if he had ever done that.

"Well, once before," he said, cutting off his words. " During what was a long pause, I noticed that Sam was quite uncomfortable talking about what happened.

He probably had never told anyone about the violence.

Depression, homelessness, the break up of the family unit, losing one’s job, losing one’s career, losing one’s house, losing one’s mind, losing one’s life even.

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As a result of the addiction , you may face ongoing hardships, such as: In most cases, drug use significantly changes the lives of all those close to the addict - none more so than the immediately family. Many drug and alcohol treatment facilities provide education for family members on topics such as how addiction works and how to handle stress.Alcohol abuse and substance abuse not only affects the individual with the problem but also the entire family.The National Institute on Drug Abuse states that an important part of a customized substance abuse treatment regimen is to address every element of life.But when I finally managed to stop I had a shocking, negative epiphany: all I’d managed to do (bar save myself from dying of liver failure) was sort out the fact that I was hung-over and ill all the time. Submit to the disease and your life becomes incredibly simple. What you have left in its place is an area of outstanding natural horror.All of the stuff that I’d drunk to avoid – mental illness, debt, depression, the impulse to self harm, the impulse to commit suicide, anxiety, social dysfunction, eating disorders, body dysmorphia, stress, anger, violent rage – was still there. Drink becomes the only thing you care about – and you will end up just fine with letting all the other stuff slide to the extent that it doesn’t even matter if you die or not. You have been tasked with draining the massive body of water away to repopulate the area. It probably feels like you should have left well enough alone. It is necessary to be aware of what you’re getting into and that way you will be less disheartened when things take a while to sort themselves out.I’d built up a number of other ‘client’ habits over the decades, which ranged from the very serious (cocaine, amphetamines) to the aggravating (junk food, sweets) via all sorts of other issues (painkillers, caffeine).

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