After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads. A part of me wants to run away, but part of me wants to give her a chance. Financial troubles she can get herself out of in time. How much more do you think you'd be hurting her if you rejected her because of it?
She seems to have a good heart, and seems like a good person. She recently just got out of a 3 year relationship. Not to mention she's got financial issues that add to her depression and baggage. When she's up, she spontaneous and fun and it's great, when she's down things get awkward.
Could it be that you're making unfounded assumptions? But in order for a relationship to work, you have to trust each other. If you see him smile in a certain way—or utter a certain phrase—and you immediately think of your abusive ex-boyfriend, or that immature idiot you rebounded with, or that unfortunate one-night stand, you're letting your past drag you unnecessarily down..4. We've written in the past about the secrets healthy couples shouldn't keep.
If you don't fully trust him—or even if you do, and are just being cautious—your paranoia can manifest itself in some extremely unattractive ways: clinginess, neediness, breaches in privacy... This is because, in order to fully commit to each other, you should also know each other pretty darn well.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! At times I feel like I'm being a little cold, but I just don't want to invest myself too much, considering the risks.
Some forums can only be seen by registered members. All this stuff is ringing up warning bells in my head.
Chances are, he can tell you're hiding something, and we're sure he'd rather hear about it than be stonewalled. You're holding back from commitment., and some of them aren't carrying an ounce of baggage.
But in many cases, the fear of tying oneself down can be indicative of a deeper problem.
And no, we're not insinuating that he broke up with you because of the way your hair frizzes up in the summer, or because you're always leaving Cheez-it crumbs in bed, or even because you sexted his mom by accident. What's weighing you down, and effing up your love life, is all that emotional baggage. If, for example, you're on a first date and feeling wary and quick to judge, you might automatically assume that your date is judging you just as harshly. Way to kill the buzz before you've even shared your first toast, right?For people to feel comfortable sharing their past, they need to feel safe, and this can take some time.So, how do you deal with emotional baggage when it’s not your own? Though on the list of the 5 ways you can tell you have emotional baggage, number one is...1. Those with baggage can oftentimes be riddled with self-doubt.If you're experiencing negative feelings about the person you're with, ask yourself where these feeling are coming from. We don't blame you for being a bit suspicious about infidelity, especially if you've been burned in the past.I'm torn because I like her and I want to help her, but I also don't want to expose myself and end up hurt, or just end up being used as some kinda rebound shoulder to cry on guy. Quality in a sucessful relationship, would be if the partner was more interested in where you two as a couple were heading into the future, rather than being so wrapped up in what she had to go through in her past.